Thursday, January 14, 2010

Keeping It Real

Hello my friends - remember when I told you I was going to be more open and let you get to know the "real" me inside and out - flaws and all?  Well... today is one of those posts so get ready!  Fellows - close your eyes and ears if you don't want to hear this first part as this one is for the girls only, um k?! :o)  Okay ladies, now that the men have left the room I have to tell you something.... come closer...closer...closer so no one can hear - are you ready?  I HATE BRAS!!!!! LOL!  Ever since I put on these 25 lbs that I have gained the last 2 years, I can NOT find a good bra that fits me and one that is comfortable without burying itself in my ribs.  I have tried cheap bras, expensive bras and all bras in between and I absolutely loathe them all! That is the first thing that goes the second I walk into the door.  Anyone else?  If you know of any really GOOD AND COMFY bras that you can pass along - I would LOVE to hear all about it!  I was quite happy with my size prior to this weight gain and can't wait until I lose this extra weight that has been holding me hostage I am carrying around so that I can go back to my "normal" boob size! HA!

Okay guys - you can come back into the room now but you might not like the rest of the post so be prepared.  It IS only meant to be funny though, as it is scarily accurate, which I am sure you will agree with! HA!


(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it:  Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

Again, my men followers, this is all in fun!  I hope that all of you have a wonderful day today - we are only 1 day away from a 3 day weekend - YAY!!!!

Lots of love and kisses,
Trac~ :o)


  1. Trac ,loved the "woman statements" one.Realy enjoyed your post!
    love and hugs

  2. As you may have read I wrote a blog about the first I do when I get home and it is take off the bra. May even happen in the car.

    I buy mine at Lane Bryant. They have soft ones with no wire which I hate.
    Good luck

  3. Sister you are so funny!! I love reading your blogs.. I wish I was as talented as you..
    Your BIGGEST fan!!!

  4. You're friggin hilarious! I too hate bras. But with the way my 'load' is feeling lately, unfortunately I can't go without :(

  5. Oh I so know what you mean re the bra, that instrument of torture. I'm so with Vodka Logic on this one. I also have removing the offending item whilst still dressed down to a fine art.
    I also love your what women mean but would add 'the look' (another non-verbal) to that list. Aah this wonderful weapon that sometimes says so much more than words ever could.

  6. The "words women use" was awesome! Spot on.

  7. haha!!! they should give men a book of clueless!
    good luck in the bra search!

  8. Bra = Stupid!

    I, too, am trying to lose some pesky weight that I've been carrying around for too long. I'm used to being around 108-110 pounds and right now am at 130!!! For me, this is just uncomfortable and annoying, but I am doing something about it now...So, in a couple months, I should be back to my normal self once more!

    I wear bras as little as possible...I think they're just plain silly...haha

  9. Yep, I can't find one that feels comfortable either. And I love the translation of women speak for the men.

  10. You are too funny, and so not alone! The bra issues is absolutely not fun! Love the little word list! So so true!!

  11. haha I hate bras too, just for different reasons, he he they are always in the way... ;)

  12. I loathe bras... awful. i own four, and i hope they never wear out because having to buy one just makes me mad. hate them.

  13. hahah! this makes me love you more.

    i loathe bras as well. hello! i have no boobs, why do i have to wear one. i do but it aint much, lemme tell ya!


  14. Bras, can't live with em and you definitely can't live without em! :)

    I have many bras in all price ranges and the one I wear the most was $12 at Target. But I am only a former boob haver. Mine have been decimated by weight loss and babies!

    Good luck!

  15. HAHAA!! omg i love this post! i need to forward this to my husband!!!


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